


Saying That I Want More (This Is What I Live For)

by SereneCalamity



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Sex, Billy loves Steve calling him pet names, Billy's a little desperate, Boys In Love, Collars, Daddy Kink, Established Relationship, Facials, Light Dom/sub, M/M, Needy Billy, Oral Sex, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Pet Names, Praise Kink, Subspace, Top Steve Harrington
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-01
Updated: 2020-07-01
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:55:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25006519
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SereneCalamity/pseuds/SereneCalamity
Summary: Billy wakes up, and remembers that he hadn't exactly been good for Steve last night.
Relationships: Billy Hargrove/Steve Harrington
Comments: 6
Kudos: 172





	Saying That I Want More (This Is What I Live For)

**Author's Note:**

> Okaaaaay. I wrote this a while ago, meant to edit it before I posted, but I didn't. Whoops. Oh well? Here we go. I've got a series with Daddy Billy (which should be getting updated within the next few days, hopefully) and I wanted to write something with Daddy Steve...
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own the characters and the title comes from Hold Me Down by Halsey, and once again, all the mistakes, editing will happen later on.
> 
> 15/08/2020 - Edit-ish :)

When Billy Hargrove woke up, it took him ten minutes before he could even part his sticky eyelids and his head was pounding and his stomach was rolling with nausea.

He felt revolting.

He didn't think he had felt this bad since he had graduated last year.

The curtains were still drawn, although it was clearly at least late morning because the sun was peeking through the gaps, and Billy rolled onto his side, away from the curtain and toward the door, and he finally opened his eyes properly.

On the bedside table, about half a metre away from his face, there was a bottle of vitamin water—his favourite, the pale pink one—and a box of Advil.

Billy's lips twitched.

Steve Harrington.

Always looking after him.

Although almost as soon as his mouth started curling up into a smile, it dropped as everything from last night came back.

They hadn't exactly been on good terms last night, when Billy had last spoken with his lover.

In fact, the reason that he had gotten _more_ drunk was pretty much out of spite, because Billy could be immature like that, and Tommy Harris had also just broken up with his girlfriend, Carol Talmadge, for the hundredth time in their long-standing relationship, so he had wanted to get drunk just as bad.

Billy made a face as he pushed himself up onto his elbow and reached out for the Advil, popping two out of the box and then taking the lid off the drink and swallowing them back.

He picked up his phone—which Steve had plugged into the charger, because Billy hardly remembered to plug it in _normally_ , muchless when he was hammered—and winced when he saw the time.

Twelve seventeen.

It was a lot later than he expected.

Even when he was out late, he usually woke up around nine or ten o'clock.

He felt a bit more panicked now.

There were quite a few notifications, mainly snapchats from his sister and from Tommy, an email from _Etsy_ telling him his latest shipment had been dispatched, and then the last one was a simple one from _Daddy_.

Steve.

**_Started work early. I'll be home at 2. Drink lots of water and have a shower before I get back._ **

Billy swallowed hard as he wiped a hand over his face, pinching the bridge of his nose before letting out a harsh breath and putting his phone back down.

He had just over two and a half hours to shower and hopefully clean the house up a bit before Steve got back.

He didn't waste time getting out of bed and going into the ensuite, turning on the shower and taking out a towel from the bottom shelf underneath the sink.

Steve and Billy both had about as many hair and body wash products as each other, so it was a good thing the house had a big shower.

Except then Billy gets caught up in the shower and completely forgets about his plans to tidy up the house because the Advil hasn't quite kicked in yet and the waterfall shower head is absolutely incredible and he was still covered in the grime and sweat from the dive bars that he and Tommy had gone to last night and so he ended up bracing his elbows against the slick tiles and just standing under the hot water, letting it sluice off his back.

It was almost one by the time Billy went back into their bedroom with his toothbrush stuck in his mouth and his hair sticking to his face and neck.

He made a face at his phone as he finished brushing his teeth and scrubbed at his hair, towel drying it, before getting dressed into a loose pair of grey sweatpants that he knew Steve loved.

He didn't bother with briefs.

Or a shirt.

He hardly ever did when he was at home.

However his stomach did squeeze a little as he opened up the top drawer of his bedside table and next to a box of tissues and a half empty bottle of cherry flavoured lube, his fingers brushed over his collar.

Which was something he almost _always_ wore when he was home.

It was deep green, almost black when the lights were dimmed, expensive leather that was worn smooth and soft on the inside from how much time it had spent wrapped around his throat.

It looked perfect against his tanned skin.

At least that was what Steve said, and Billy liked to agree with him.

Billy wrapped the collar around his throat, fumbling a bit with the buckle since usually it was Steve who put it on, and his head straight away started feeling a little fuzzy as soon as he felt the leather against his skin, but he managed to get it fastened and once he was done, he tucked two fingers underneath it and tested it, just like Steve always did, to make sure there was enough breathing room.

The house was pretty tidy, both Steve and Billy had a thing for that—Billy had grown up in a perpetually messy household that he was somehow always blamed for and Steve just liked things going back where they belonged—but there were a couple of dishes that were probably from Steve's breakfast, that he washed and dried and then he started shuffling things around in the lounge as he waited for Steve.

Time passed both too fast _and_ too slow.

The fight had been stupid.

Billy had been drunk when Steve had called him last night and asked him when he was going to be home.

At first it had been playful, Billy teasing Steve and saying that he was out with Tommy and he would be back _when he felt like it_.

Depending on Steve's mood, his response could have been something playful in response, or something a little more biting, like an ultimatum with a hint of a threat involved that would have Billy wanting to skip to obey, but either way, it wasn't as though Billy _had_ to listen to Steve.

He had his own life and did his own thing—even if those things occasionally got him punished by his daddy—but it had turned out that last night had been the night that Billy had agreed to go with Steve to one of his work functions.

They weren't even that _bad_.

He liked a few of Steve's work colleagues, the food was always good and the drinks always free and if he behaved the whole way through, Steve always made sure to reward him.

But Billy had been feeling bratty when he started sassing Steve back, and then he'd tripped and fallen off his bar stool and knocked into some asshole drunk next to him who had snapped at him and spilled his drink all over Billy's favourite boots which put him in a foul mood, then Steve had actually started getting annoyed and saying that they had to leave in an hour, and Billy could be bratty but he could also just be an _asshole_ , and Steve knew the difference and so before things could get too out of hand, he had just told Billy to have fun with Tommy and to call if he needed a ride.

Technically, he had done what any good lover and partner would do when there was a disagreement.

Because Steve was good like that.

Steve was _amazing_ like that.

He was the best fucking thing that had ever happened to Billy.

Billy had known that there would be hell to pay for it later, but Steve hadn't turned it into some big fight that would ruin his evening with his friend and he didn't text him and act snippy like some partners would.

But then Billy had seen some photos go up on Nancy Wheelers Instagram story featuring Steve, and Nancy was one of Steve's work colleagues that Billy _didn't_ like, and her and Steve were both dressed up all smart and clean and Steve was smiling widely at the camera and Nancy looked all pretty and Billy had almost smashed the screen of his phone as his finger started jabbing out an angry message.

There had been a long delay before he got anything back, which meant he had sent even _more_ angry texts and had even _more_ to drink, which wasn't a good mix, and in the end, Steve had just said he didn't want to hear from him again unless it was because he needed a ride.

Billy had just replied _fuck you_.

 _That_ had been infuriating because Billy could just _picture his face_ in the resounding silence he got in response.

His _daddy face_.

Eyes dark and lips pursed and expression both disappointed and lustful.

That would usually have been more than enough to have Billy running home, but he knew that Steve was still going to be out schmoozing for hours and then Tommy shouted that he wanted to go to the strippers to make himself feel better and so they ended up at a low rent strip club with even more alcohol and then...Everything got fuzzy.

He was pretty sure Tommy lost interest when he was reminded forcefully by one of the security guards that he could only look, not touch, and it wasn't as though Billy was interested in ogling anyone who wasn't Steve so he was just throwing back shot after shot, and so they ended up leaving to go another bar.

Then he thinks they played pool against some guys who were decidedly more sober than them and they had taken them for all the money they had in their wallets.

He's not too sure how he got home, but it was probably Steve.

It was always Steve who had his back.

Probably even got Tommy back to his flat as well, because he was just the best.

Billy's stomach dipped as he heard the sound of an engine in the driveway, and he scratched his nails through his shaggy blonde hair which was almost dried by this point before his arms fell to his sides, fingers twitching.

There was silence as the engine was turned off and Billy swallowed dryly, absently thinking to himself that he should have had more water to drink because there was no saliva in his mouth.

His hands wanted to clasp together behind his back but he waited to see what Steve was going to say when he walked in.

It felt like _eternity_ before Billy finally heard a key in the lock and then the front door was pushed open and Steve stepped inside, head tipped forward and eyes on his phone.

He was wearing a pair of tailored navy pants that clung to his thighs and ass with a button down, pale pink shirt tucked in, the first couple of buttons undone and his tie loose now that he was done with his work day, and his hair a little tousled, like he had been running his fingers through it.

Steve looked edible and there was just something in the way that he held himself that made Billy's shoulders slump and his knees weak.

Then he looked up from his phone and saw Billy standing there, and his eyes narrowed slightly but other than that, his expression remained impassive.

Neither of them said anything, but Billy saw Steve's eyes drop to the collar around his neck and trail over his bare chest and stomach before lifting back to meet Billy's gaze.

The silence stretched between them and then Billy couldn't take it anymore, falling to his knees, barely able to feel any pain even though he had fallen hard, given how plush the carpet was underneath him, and he let his head fall forward, chin close to his chest.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled, and the words were always hard to say for him, but he felt relief once they were out.

Steve didn't reply for a few beats, but Billy heard the sound of him putting down his keys and phone on the side table and approaching slowly.

"Yeah?" He asked quietly, voice deep and rolling over Billy like the waves of the beach outside, soothing and calm. "You're sorry?" He _knew_ how hard it was for Billy to say and he wasn't making it easy for him.

"I'm sorry," Billy repeated quietly, voice wavering.

Steve was quiet again, and it was disorientating, but then Billy saw Steve's shoes come into his line of vision and a hand reached out and touched his hair.

Billy all but _melted_ into the touch.

Steve's thick fingers stroked through Billy's hair, smooth and slow, scratching gently at his scalp, and Billy's body tipped to the side, seeking out his warmth, and Steve let him, fingers continuing to massage his head, a thumb slipping behind his ear and pressing in gently.

Billy whimpered.

"You were a brat last night, Billy," Steve said quietly, and Billy sucked his lower lip into his mouth, head still dipped downward. Steve calling him by his name didn't happen all that often, usually all he got was terms of endearments. "You were rude when I called you to remind you about dinner. And then you got so drunk you threw up all over yourself before you managed to call me to come get you and Tommy home." Billy winced, because now that Steve said that, he _did_ remember, although it had actually been _Tommy's_ throw up, not his own, but he was pretty sure that wasn't going to help his case here. "Not a very good boy, huh, Billy?"

Billy whimpered again, chewing down on his pouty lower lip.

He wasn't sure where this was going, but he just wanted Steve to stop calling him Billy.

He wanted to be called _baby_ , but he knew he had to earn it, especially after what he had done last night.

"Can I see your eyes?" Steve asked a little softer and Billy's head felt so heavy that it was actually a bit difficult for him to raise it, but he did, because Steve had asked him to, and when his daddy asked him to do something, he _usually_ did it. He _tried_ to. He tipped his head back until he was looking up at Steve who was standing over him, throat contracting as he swallowed hard, mouth still dry. "How are you feeling?" Steve questioned, eyebrows pulling together as he looked Billy over, eyes searching and Steve's fingers gently moving to touch Billy's temples and forehead. "Your head? You had anything to eat or drink?"

"I—" Billy cut himself off before shaking his head.

"Come on," Steve murmured, all soft and caring, and Billy wasn't sure if that was better or _worse_ , because now he felt even _more_ guilty about acting like a brat last night. "We need to get something proper into you."

Steve's arms circled underneath Billy's arms, taking his weight and helping him to his feet.

Billy felt light headed as he regained his balance, Steve standing there the whole time, steady and true, and when Billy blinked hazily up at him, Steve smiled slightly and cupped his face, leaning forward to press a light kiss to his forehead.

"Come on, baby," Steve whispered and Billy's knees almost gave out again at the simple pet name. He lead Billy into the kitchen and waited for him to climb up onto a stools at the breakfast bar and then he moved around the kitchen. He poured a glass a water and slid it across the bench to Billy and then opened the door of the fridge. Billy drained the glass off water obediently in a few gulps and put the glass back down, his eyes never leaving Steve. "You want me to fry you some bacon and eggs? Or would you be happy with fruit?"

The fact that Steve actually gave Billy specific options, and only two of them, definitely meant that he knew what head space Billy was in right now, not wanting to overwhelm him by making making too many choices.

"Fruit," Billy replied simply and Steve nodded, taking out an apple and a carton of grapes.

He rinsed off the grapes and pulled them off the vine, dropping them into a bowl, and then sliced the apple into seven slices and arranged them on a plate and slid both across the counter to Billy before refilling his glass with water and passing it back again.

Steve's attention was completely on Billy as he ate, eyes focused, making sure Billy drank the second glass of water and all of the fruit and then he nodded at the floor.

It wasn't carpeted in the kitchen, it was tiled.

It wasn't going to be forgiving under his knees.

Billy did it without a second thought, sucking his bottom lip into his mouth and staring up at Steve through thick eyelashes.

"How are you feeling?" He asked quietly.

"Good," Billy replied instantly.

"Promise?" Steve continued and Billy couldn't help his lips from quirking upwards in a small, relaxed smile.

"Promise," he answered and Steve nodded and stroked Billy's hair once.

"Are you hard?" Steve asked, shifting the tone of the conversation swiftly with one question and it made Billy's eyelashes flutter shut and his stomach dip and his cock twitch.

"Getting there," he said honestly, voice sounding thick, and Steve hummed in response, reaching out for him.

Steve's fingers were tracing along the edge of the buttery leather of the collar, manicured nails gently brushing against the tender skin of Billy's neck, and Billy couldn't help his sharp intake of breath.

He was half hard already inside his sweatpants.

Then Steve's fingers curled into the collar and gave it a slight tug, so that it tightened around Billy's throat, applying pressure against his wind pipe, and even just that slightest pressure made Billy's eyes start to roll and his breathing come out in stutters.

Steve knelt behind him, smoothing a hand down Billy's thigh over the soft material of his sweatpants, pressing himself up so that his clothed chest was against Billy's bare back and then gently urged Billy until he was resting back on his haunches rather than standing up on his knees, and he turns his head so that his nose is pressed against Billy's hair and his mouth is hot against Billy's ear.

"Wrap your hand around yourself, baby," Steve whispered breathily. "Jerk yourself off."

Billy shivered and closed his eyes for a moment, sucking his lower lip into his mouth.

He wanted _Steve_ to touch.

He wanted _his daddy_ to touch him.

But he didn't know how to ask, because the idea of getting words out right now just didn't seem like an option because his tongue felt heavy in his mouth, and if Steve was going to let him get some kind of relief even though he had been so disappointed was a big thing, and he didn't want to be unappreciative of it.

Billy sunk a shaky hand under the elastic band of his sweatpants and let out a shuddering breath as his fingers brushed against his cock, which was fully hard now.

"That's it, baby," Steve murmured, the tip of his nose brushing against the curve of Billy's ear and his breath tickling Billy's neck, making a shiver wrack through him. "Make yourself feel good." His hands rested on Billy's hips, not tight and controlling, like they sometimes were—like Billy was _craving_ for—just heavy enough so that Billy was aware of their presence, and Billy couldn't stop another moan as he began to move his hand a bit faster. "Do you want to come?"

"I—" Billy's eyes squeezed shut, his head dropping back so that it was resting on Steve's shoulder. " _Daddy_?"

"Yeah, baby?" Steve's hands on his hips moved gently, stroking up and down his side. "Does my sweetheart want to come?"

His voice was all syrupy and sweet and it made Billy shiver and it seemed as though he had completely forgiven Billy for last night so his hand started to move faster, twisting around the head in the way that Steve did so much better and he wished that Steve would grip his collar and tug or bite at his neck or pull his hair, but he would take what he could get.

" _Daddy_..." Billy whined as he felt a familiar tug in the bit of his stomach, behind his belly button, and his hips began to jerk forward in time with the pulls of his hand and the tips of his ears burned. "Daddy, c-can I—"

"No," Steve whispered simply, words directly in Billy's ear, and Billy's eyes flashed open, lips parting as his hand stuttered around his cock.

It felt like there had been a bucket of icy water dumped over him on a burning day in the middle of summer, because he felt simultaneous frozen and burnt at the same time.

The ends of his fingers were tingling and his shoulders felt shaky and his hand was still wrapped around himself because even though Steve had said that he couldn't come, he hadn't told him to stop touching himself.

"Daddy, I—"

"Yeah, baby?" Steve's voice was still right there, lips brushing against the cartilage of his ear, breathing not quite as even as it usually was. "What is it?"

"I—" Billy broke off with a gasp as one of Steve's hands came around to flick at his pierced nipple.

His back arched and his stomach dipped and his cock throbbed and it would be so easy to come, but he didn't, because he'd already disobeyed Steve enough in the past twenty-four hours, he wasn't going to do it again.

His palm was sweaty against his cock, and he wasn't even moving his hand anymore, just holding his cock loosely, and he tossed his head from side to side on Steve's shoulder, his curls getting even messier.

"Iwannacome," Billy managed to get out, all jumbled up, and there was a sharp intake of breath from Steve as he processed Billy's words, and then his fingers pinched at Billy's nipple again, pulling at the hoop that the blonde had gotten when he'd been drunk after his high school graduation three years ago. "Please, daddy..." Steve kept playing with the piercing, tugging and pulling, the other hand gently gliding up and down Billy's stomach, over his abs and the light hairs of his treasure trail, and then back down again, and their were goosebumps spreading across his skin. "I wanna come," Billy said again, his voice coming out more high pitched now, and he started moving his hand again, because Steve wasn't saying _no_. His daddy wasn't saying _no_ , so maybe there was a chance. "Daddy, I—"

"No, darling," Steve said quietly, voice deep and rough and Billy couldn't help but _whine_.

"But I—"

"I said _no_ ," Steve's voice came out more firmly this time.

Billy shook in his arms as his hand came to an unsteady stop again.

Steve's hands didn't stop, stroking his stomach and pulling at his nipple, little twinges of pain shooting through Billy's body, conflicting with the slow, soothing strokes that were coming from Steve's other palm on his lower torso that made sure the fire in his belly was stoked.

Billy's breathing was coming out more laboured, his chest heaving and his wind pipe pressing against his collar, making him vividly aware of it's presence which just made his cock drip.

" _Daddy_..." Billy's vocabulary had completely shrunk, the fingers of the hand that wasn't wrapped around himself coming up to grab at the forearm of Steve's arm that was playing with his nipple, nails digging into the skin. "Please? Please, I...I _wanna come_."

"We can't always get what we want, baby," Steve responded airily, and Billy's eyelids flashed open at that, shoulders seizing up.

"I'm—" he tried to wiggle out of Steve's grasp so that he could turn around to face his older lover, but Steve's arms tightened, keeping him in place on his knees, facing forward with Steve kneeling behind him, chest pressed to his back. "I'm _sorry_ , daddy, I—" Steve's hands moved so they were both on his hips again. "I, just—I'm _sorry_."

"I don't really think you are, Billy," Steve murmured, and they were back to _Billy_ again, and it was almost enough to make him sob.

He'd been _baby_ and _darling_ and _sweetheart_ and now that last night had been brought up, he was _Billy_ again.

" _Daddy_ ," he tried to twist himself around again, but Steve's hands were firm, like vices on his hips.

"You were a real brat last night, Billy," Steve said. "I never said that you needed to come to the dinner last night, but when I asked you, you said yes. I thought it was going to be fun, you know that I like to show you off," Steve stroked his thumb over the bare skin of Billy's waist and it made him shiver, his hand squeezing lightly at the base of his cock. "But then you decided to go back on your word and get drunk with Tommy, and if that wasn't enough, you then decide to get angry at _me_ and send me a bunch of texts about how I'm spending all my time with Nancy." Billy's eyebrows pulled together as he remembered the picture he had seen last night, but it was hard to feel that same anger that he had been feeling last night when his head felt a bit fuzzy and most of his blood had rushed down to his groin. "I work with Nancy a lot, and you know that she's a friend of mine. But if you were there last night, like you said you'd be, you would have seen that we were only together for a few minutes."

Then there was silence.

Billy's mouth felt dry, and he tried to wet his lips with his tongue as he blinked a couple of times, brain attempting to find the right words to say.

"I'm sorry, daddy," is all he managed to weakly offer.

"Are you sure about that?" Steve asked, hands still tight on Billy hips.

" _Yes_ ," Billy whined out, sounding like a pouty child.

"Hm," Steve hummed out, and he gave Billy's hips a squeeze before he was abruptly standing up and Billy nearly tipped right over backwards onto the tiled floor of the kitchen because he had been leaning his full weight onto Steve.

But Steve didn't let him fall, because he never did, even when he'd been a brat and a downright asshole, and his hands were steady on Billy's shoulders until he was settled back on his knees again, and then he moved to stand in front of Billy, still fully dressed in his work attire and looking good enough to eat.

"So you promise to be a good boy for the rest of the day? To make it up to me?" Steve asked, speaking carefully with slightly raised eyebrows as he stared down at Billy, and the height difference and obvious power imbalance was making Billy feel dizzy.

"I promise," he managed to say, his throat clicking.

Steve stared at him for a long few moments, eyes considering, before his hands went to his belt, deft fingers undoing the buckle and then the button and zipper of his pants, and Billy watched every moment with hazy, blue eyes.

He pulled out his cock and Billy's mouth _watered_ , and he could feel his brain beginning to short circuit.

Or maybe it was _finishing_ circuiting _completely_ , because the only word that was going through his head was daddy— _daddydaddydaddy_.

Steve held himself in one hand while the other reached out for Billy, running over his dry mouth before he pressed two fingers between his lips, the pads of his fingers rubbing against Billy's tongue and making the blonde whine from deep in his throat.

The taller man paused, his fingers pressing down harder on Billy's tongue and Billy's heavy eyelids fluttered open to look up at him.

"Good boys don't make noises unless they're given permission," Steve said softly, the words idle but with intent behind them and Billy swallowed as best as he could around Steve's fingers, nodding and trying to show him that he understood. Steve stared down at him for another few moments before nodding once, and resuming the motions with his fingers, letting them slide further down Billy's tongue, toward the back of his throat. Billy wanted to moan, but he forced himself not to, staring up at Steve as best as he could through lust-hazy eyes. "I want you to suck me off. I'm going to come on your face, and then I'm going to go have a shower, and when I get out, you're still going to be kneeling here, okay?" Billy jerked his head in a few eager nods, just wanting to make up for what he had done last night, wanting to make Steve happy, wanting Steve to call him _baby_ again. Steve was watching him carefully, as he pulled his fingers slowly from Billy's mouth, and Billy knew that it was because Steve wanted to make sure he was okay, and Billy made sure to nod again, a bit slower this time, reassuring Steve, and then Steve moved a bit quicker. "Okay, baby," Steve murmured as he wrapped his damp fingers around his cock and stroke himself a few times, and Billy's head felt like it was going to burst from how happy he was that Steve was calling him _baby_.

Steve fed his cock into Billy's mouth, and Billy's eyes rolled back as he just took everything that Steve gave him.

He didn't move, other than his tongue pressing at the spongy underside of Steve's cock head, and Steve threaded his fingers into Billy's curls, rocking his hips back and forth, setting a slow and steady pace to begin with.

As Steve began to speed up, Billy almost let out a groan as the tears gathered in the corners of his eyes, but he managed to keep it back, his heart pounding in his chest at _how badly_ he wanted to be good for Steve, and one of Steve's hands began to run through his hair, while the other gripped it firmly.

"You're being so good, Billy," Steve whispered as he thrust hard enough for the head of his cock to hit the back of Billy's throat. "You're always so good for me, baby, so fucking perfect."

The tears spilled over the corners of his eyes at the words, relief flooding through Billy at the fact that Steve was saying he was _good_ again, even though he had been acting like a brat.

Because Steve always knew what he needed, and never left him dangling there in the wind, twisted up and knotted.

Sure, there were times when he _wanted_ more, but he never _needed_ for more than he ever got.

Steve's pace increased to brutal, the head of his cock bruising the back of Billy's throat in the best way, tears streaming down Billy's face as he fought to keep his eyes open so that he was still watching Steve, and Steve was staring down at him with dark eyes, lips pursed together and orgasm building quickly, his toes curled into the bottom of the shoes that he was still wearing.

Billy made little noises before he came, but Steve's movements just became jerkier and the way that he held Billy's hair just got tighter, and he recognized all of these signs from the time that they had been together, feeling himself begin to get moved more roughly and at a quicker pace.

"Billy, baby," Steve's voice sounded hoarse, and he suddenly tugged so hard at Billy's hair that sharp sparks of pain flew through him before he was pulled off, and then Steve's shiny, red cock was directly in front of Billy's face, and Billy let his eyes fall closed just in time as Steve began to come.

Warm ribbons striped across his face, over his cheek and mouth and left eye and Billy's whole head just felt fuzzy and his body felt light as he sat there and took everything that Steve gave to him.

Billy absently knew that his knees were hurting, but everything just felt really far away and so the pain wasn't processing properly, all that he was thinking was _daddydaddydaddy_.

He didn't open his eyes, because he could feel come all over one of them and close to the other, and all he could smell was the musky scent of Steve's come, but he didn't worry about what he had to do next, because Steve always looked after that.

Sure enough, after the breathing in the kitchen seemed to even out, Billy felt hands on his neck and face, touching everywhere that wasn't covered in come, and then Billy felt kisses against his shoulders and hands smoothing up and down his back as he murmured reassuring words against Billy's skin that Billy couldn't quite understand, but the lovingly soft way they were uttered made him feel as though he was floating on a cloud.

Steve pulled away for a little bit, although he kept talking to Billy, so that the kneeling blonde always knew that he wasn't too far away, and then he was back, and he was cleaning Billy's face with a damp cloth, carefully making sure he didn't press too hard when he cleaned around his eye, and then kissing every inch of freshly cleaned skin as he went, making Billy smile a bit dumbly as he slowly let his eyes open back up.

When they met Steve's, Steve smiled gently at him.

"There you are, baby," he whispered and it made Billy sigh heavily and happily. Billy was _very_ aware of his own arousal, pressing against the soft material of his sweatpants, but his hands still hung limply at his side because right now wasn't about him. "How are you feeling, baby?" Steve asked as his fingers gently ran along Billy's collar, only applying the slightest pressure so that Billy was aware of the movement but so he wasn't cutting off any of his breathing, and it made him shiver.

"Good, daddy. I'm good," Billy breathed and his hooded eyes processed as Steve nodding slowly.

"That's good, darling," Steve leaned in, pressing a kiss to Billy's temple before he straightened up, and it was then that Billy saw he was tucked away, already looking all put back together in his outfit from his work day. "You're going to stay here for me, aren't you? While I go and shower?" Billy just nodded, staying quiet because that was the easiest option, and he let his eyes close again, because they were so heavy. He couldn't hear Steve, but he assumed that he had left the room, until he felt fingers brushing over the back of his head. "Good boy," Steve murmured, and it made Billy preen, tipping his head into the touch, his cheeks undoubtedly pinking when he felt another kiss being pressed to the top of his head, and then he knew Steve left him alone in the kitchen.

Sometimes he couldn't be alone after they had started playing together, but Steve knew the right moments, and right now, he was okay.

He was aware of Steve's movements in the house around him, and he knew that Steve was making extra noise just so Billy would be able to hear him, because Steve could move quieter than a mouse when he wanted to.

He heard Steve down the hall, in their bedroom, and then he heard him taking off his shoes and putting them on the shoe rack in the front foyer, and then the sound of shower starting, so he must have left both the bathroom door _and_ the bedroom door open, which Billy appreciated.

He let himself float, not feeling _any_ of that anxiety that he had been feeling earlier about Steve coming home and about what he had done last night.

Steve had told him what he needed to do in order to be a good boy, and he'd already done some of that, and Steve had _told_ him that he was a good boy, so he just needed to stay where he was and then Steve would come back and everything would be okay.

He could feel the pain in his knees, although it wasn't an overwhelming pain that he couldn't handle, and his thighs were burning a bit, from how long they had been stretched in this position, but it was a _good_ pain, one that he liked, the muscles straining a little and reminding him that he was in a position that wasn't _about_ him, it was about how good he looked for Steve.

So Billy waited...And waited...And waited.

He could feel himself drifting and his cock wasn't as hard as it had been before but there was still definitely arousal burning through him and he had completely tuned out his surroundings, because when he felt a hand cupping his face, his body jerked as his eyes flashed open to look up at Steve.

"Hey, baby," Steve's voice was soft and slow, like honey slowly sliding down a knife, and it made Billy's insides light up like a Christmas tree.

"Hey, daddy," he returned, his own voice airy.

"You look so beautiful," Steve added gently and then he was reaching down, putting his hands underneath Billy's armpits and helping him to his feet. Billy's legs were shaky and he would have fallen over if Steve wasn't there to support him, but he trusted Steve to hold him up as the blood started circulating properly again and he found his steady footing. "You were so good for me, Billy, staying on your knees for me like a good boy." And Billy nearly swooned and his knees almost buckled right then and there, but Steve had been ready for it, his hands still on Billy's sides, keeping him upright as he leaned in to give him a soft kiss on his cheekbone. "Did you want to watch some TV? Or did you need a nap?"

"I only woke up...An hour or so ago," Billy said clumsily, not able to remember exactly how long ago he had gotten out of bed, but he didn't feel tired, just spacey.

"Alright, darling," Steve slid an arm around his waist, pulling him in close against his side, and Billy let him be tucked against his side, loving how tall Steve felt against his side, and despite how bulky and muscled Billy was, Steve still managed to make Billy feel small and looked after. "Let's go watch some TV."

Billy knelt in front of the couch, beside Steve's feet, as Steve settled on the couch, and the older man scrolled through Netflix as he looked for something to watch.

In the end, he went with _Avatar: The Last Airbender_ , a show they'd both watched through at least twice before, because it wouldn't require too much thinking from him, and it also wouldn't jar Billy too much out of his current head space.

Billy continued to drift, vision blurry, as the TV played and Steve's fingers stroked through his hair, occasionally scratching at his scalp, and Billy's head was tipped backwards, pushing as far back into Steve's hand as he possibly could with his throat exposed.

Billy thought they were maybe two or three episodes in when Steve encouraged him onto the couch beside him, rubbing at his thighs and his knees, making soothing sounds as he looked at Billy's face and saw the way his pupils were blown and how he was breathing in and out hard through his nose.

"How are you feeling, baby?" Steve asked as he gently pushed Billy's hair back from his forehead so that his curls were framing his face.

"Goo', daddy," Billy slurred slightly and Steve smiled at him, and then he kissed him on the mouth, soft but insistent, tongue licking at his bottom lip. Billy opened his mouth straight away, even if he couldn't quite function enough to kiss Steve back properly, but he could feel Steve's tongue in his mouth, slowly tasting the ridges on the roof of his mouth and then rolling over his teeth. Steve kept one hand on the side of Billy's face, fingers steady and firm against his cheek and chin, while the other moved down to press to Billy's lap, over his crotch, where he was getting hard again. " _Daddy_ ," Billy whimpered.

"Yeah, baby? You think that you're ready to come?" Steve asked quietly and Billy's breathing hitched as his head fell, down to rest against the side of Steve's neck, just breathing heavily.

" _Please_ ," he whined. "I've been good—I'm sorry a-about last night."

He could feel Steve nodding along with him, and it made him shake, his body shivering at the idea of his orgasm being so close, and he tried to show his appreciation by kissing and sucking at whatever part of Steve he could get his mouth on, which was mostly his neck and perfect collarbones, trying to mark him as much as he could.

"I know you have been, darling, I know you have," Steve agreed gently. "How about you undress for me, yeah?" Steve prompted and Billy nodded again, trying to slide off Steve's lap and would have ended up in a pile of limbs on the ground if Steve hadn't reached out to steady him.

Billy undressed clumsily, kicking off his sweatpants so that he was only left in the dark green leather collar, and then he stared down at Steve, waiting for his next move.

"I want you to open yourself up, baby," Steve told him, nodding at the coffee table in front of him—behind Billy's calves—which was where they kept a small bottle of lube and even some condoms, although they hadn't used them in a while. "Sit on my lap and open yourself up." Billy wanted to whine, because he was obviously still being _punished_ , just not in the same way that he had been before, because Steve always opened him up so much better, his fingers could touch all the spots that Billy couldn't reach himself, but it was better than nothing, so he shakily took the bottle of lube out of one of the drawers in the coffee table and then moved to straddle Steve's thighs. "That's it," Steve's voice was quiet as he rested his hands on Billy's bare thighs, gently scratching through the short hairs there, watching as Billy's hands shook as he poured some lube onto his fingers.

He whined as he pressed the tip of his index finger inside him, body tensing for a moment before he relaxed and began to push down.

Steve moved one hand to his hip, and then further around so that his nails were scratching lightly at Billy's back and then curving down to his ass.

Billy sunk his full index finger inside him as he jerked his ass up to meet Steve's waiting palm, moaning at the intrusion although barely noticing the stretch, given how used to it he was.

Steve just left his hand there, curved over Billy's ass and squeezing every now and then as Billy's fingers stretched him open to accommodate two, and then three fingers, his body beginning to shake and his eyes fluttering shut even though he was trying to keep them open.

"Do you feel like you're ready, baby?" Steve asked, and his fingers began to trace patterns that were ghost-light over Billy's lower back, drifting over the crease of his ass and sending a shiver directly up Billy's spine and made his fingers jolt inside of him. "Do you think you can take me now?" His fingers brushed over the knuckles of Billy's fist, where it was twisted around with three fingers buried inside him, and then slowly, Steve was pushing a dry finger inside alongside Billy's three fingers and Billy couldn't help but _collapse_ , his arm going slack and his face falling into the curve of Steve's neck. "That fill you up good, baby?"

" _Daddy_ ," is all Billy is able to gasp.

"Yeah, darling," Steve breathed, turning his head to the side and kissing Billy's sweat-sticky temple and his cheek, before he pulled his finger out and stroked both his hands up and down Billy's back. "Let me make you feel good. You've made daddy feel so good, and you've been so good for me, completely made up for last night."

" _Daddy, daddy_ ," Billy's breathing was catching in his throat as he rocked forward, both hands coming up to clutch at Steve's chest, scratching at the shirt that Steve had put on after his shower, a soft, baby pink henley that just made him look so domestic and sweet and maybe completely the opposite of what some people thought that _daddy_ should look like, but he was every single thing that Billy needed.

He punished, but he never hit him.

He scolded, but he was never cruel.

He loved Billy with everything he had and he never held back, didn't hold it hostage—when Billy was bad, he didn't drag it out and make Billy spiral and think that Steve was going to let him go, leave him, abandon him—he looked after him, cared for him, made sure he knew that he loved him, even when he was a brat or had genuinely pissed him off.

It was something that Billy had craved all of his life, unconditional love, and Steve gave that to him, absolutely adored him while helping to keep his head quiet and giving him gentle boundaries along the way.

"You're so incredible, baby," Steve was still saying, nuzzling into Billy's curls with his nose and making Billy want to _purr_ with happiness. Billy was vaguely aware of the fact that he was smearing lube on Steve's shirt since it was on one of his hands, but Steve didn't care, and so there was no way that Billy could bring himself to, especially when Steve's hands moved off Billy for a split second, just to whip his shirt over his head and throw it to the ground. "Come here..." Steve reached out for Billy and Billy just fell back into him, their mouths coming together messily, their naked torsos pressed together.

Billy rolled his hips, his cock rubbing up against Steve's bare stomach, and he just wanted Steve's fingers _inside him_.

Or better yet, Steve's cock.

They kissed and kissed and Billy was clearly the more anxious one, trying to speed things up and pour every single feeling he had into the kiss while Steve was moving slower, more in control as he lazily rolled his tongue over Billy's, his teeth pressing against Billy's lower lip and not letting Billy rush things, even though it was clear that he wanted to.

Billy was rutting against Steve's stomach, the friction nice but just not enough to get him off, and Steve _knew_ that, and he was just kissing Billy slow and stroking his back softly, every now and then letting one hand trail all the way up Billy's spine until his fingers brushed against the leather of his collar and giving it the _slightest_ of tugs, just enough to make Billy's breath hitch.

"Daddy," Billy whined after a while, pulling away from Steve and shoving his face into Steve's neck, sucking down on the first spot his mouth came in contact with and his eyes closing as he felt Steve's fingers flex where they were resting over his hips. " _Please_."

"Yeah?" Steve asked, voice gentle and just a _tiny bit_ teasing. "You think you're ready? You think you're wet enough?"

" _Yes_!" Billy knew that he sounded too eager as he jerked his head up, looking at Steve with bleary eyes. "Please, please— _yes_ , I'm ready, daddy." Steve kept looking at him, hands still firm on his hips, and there was something almost calculating in his gaze. Billy drew in a sharp, desperate breath through his teeth. "Please, daddy," Billy blinked and stuck out his lower lip a little in a pout, batting his eyelashes in the way that he new Steve liked— _anything_ to just get Steve to _finally_ be inside him.

"God, you're a brat," Steve breathed out with a fond smile and then his hips were jerking upwards and his cock was shoved deep inside Billy, so hard and fast that Billy could feel it in his molars.

There wasn't any lube on Steve's cock, the only slickness was from the lube around and inside Billy's ass, and so there was a slight burn, but it was _so good_.

Billy's eyes rolled back into his head and his whole body felt as though it had gone completely boneless as he fell forward, lax against Steve's body as his face was shoved into the brunette's shoulder, Steve rutting his hips upward over and over and over again, hard and fast, the head of his cock slamming into his prostate every single time, hands clenched around Billy's hips and fingers digging in, the promise of purple bruises on the horizon.

"Does that feel good, baby?" Steve asked, his voice strained as Billy's walls clenched around him. "Do you feel full?"

" _D-daddy_ ," was all Billy managed to slur as Steve slammed into him, pushing Billy's hips down to meet the thrust of his hips, controlling all of his movements, manhandling him in a way that made Billy's mind completely fuzzy and his eyes begin to glaze over. If this has been someone else—over a year ago, before he reconnected with Steve—he would have liked what was happening, but he wouldn't have been able to completely give himself over, he wouldn't have been able to let himself sink, he wouldn't have been able to trust the other person. But he could with Steve. Be could have anything he wanted with Steve. "Daddy, I..." he didn't even know what he was trying to say, slumped forward and sweating, both arms gripping at Steve's biceps as he just let Steve give him everything.

"I've got you, darling," Steve's voice rasped in his ear. "Just let go when you need to."

Billy's body convulsed at the permission.

He came on Steve's next slide into his body, coating both his and Steve's lower stomachs with ropes of come, moaning and drooling over Steve's shoulder, tears pooling in his eyes as Steve just kept pushing into him, somehow getting even faster and harder, making Billy's toes curl with over-sensitivity, but there was nothing he could do about it, and his body just felt like a pile of mush, so he just laid there and let Steve move him however he saw fit.

Everything just felt nice and cloudy in the best possibly way when Steve turned his head to the side to press a sloppy kiss to his temple as he let out a long, guttural moan as he emptied himself inside of Billy, and then things went still around them.

Billy let himself float, skin tingling as he absently felt Steve trail his fingers up and down his back and kiss the side of his face and stroke his hair and whisper things softly in his ear; saying he was good, saying he was perfect, saying he loved Billy.

Billy smiled a little dreamily as he felt himself get moved onto the couch beside Steve, not moving at all to help but knowing that Steve didn't mind one bit, and the couch felt a hundred times softer than it usually did, one of the fluffy cushions moved under his head, and he was pretty sure he fell asleep as Steve began cleaning him down gently with a wet wipe.

He didn't know how much time passes, sometimes it got like this, and the next time that he opened his eyes properly, there's a soft blanket pulled over both himself and Steve, where his lover is sitting halfway down the couch with Billy's legs pulled over his lap and his hands are idly rubbing up and down his thighs in a soothing motion, and there was something on the TV, but Steve's attention was on Billy the moment he realized that the blonde was opening his eyes.

"Hey," Billy murmured, his voice sounding groggy, and Steve smiled.

"Hey, baby," he replied softly. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm good," Billy nodded, taking in a deep breath through his nose and then releasing it through his lips, all of the tension that had been in his body just a few hours ago completely gone now. But as soon as he remembered _why,_ he was tense and he blinked a few times. "Daddy?" He croaked out and Steve tilted his head to the side, expression soft and hands gentle where they had stopped on Billy's knees. "Are you...Still mad at me?"

"Baby..." Steve's eyebrows pulled together and he reached out an arm to grip Billy's, pulling him forward until he was in a more upright position, even if his body still felt like a pile of goo and he was curling forward, half in Steve's lap, over his legs. "I'm not mad at you. I was upset before, but you were so good for me, and you made it up to me, and that's it, right? You were _so good_ for me. Such a good boy."

"Thank you," Billy said quietly, shoulders loose and mind happy, lifting his head to look up at Steve, meeting his fond eyes. "I love you."

"I love you more, baby," Steve responded, giving him the most tender, loving kiss that made Billy's heart ache in the best possible way.

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think x 
> 
> Twitter: [CalamitySerene](https://twitter.com/CalamitySerene)  
> Tumblr: [SereneCalamity](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/serenecalamity)


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